Issue link: https://maltatoday.uberflip.com/i/1506996
OPINION 10 maltatoday | WEDNESDAY • 6 SEPTEMBER 2023 IT almost starts out like a Grimm Brothers fairy-tale, doesn't it? "Once upon a time, there was magical kingdom called 'Europa Universalis' [not to be confused with the classic 4X strategy game, released by Paradox Interactive in 2000], that was ruled - in per- fect bliss and harmonisation - by a Queen named Ursula von der Leyen. "As unelected ruler of the entire kingdom, Queen Ursula had ac- cess to everything a Disney Prin- cess could possibly desire: fame, fortune, power, an annual salary of €400,000+ (plus tax-free al- lowances)... but her most prized possession, by far, was her darling little pony, 'Dolly': which she kept paddocked in a small glade near the town of Burgdorf-Beinhorn, in Lower Saxony. "For some obscure reason, how- ever: she insisted on keeping her precious Dolly locked up in that paddock... even though was com- mon knowledge, throughout the land, that the surrounding forests were also home to – you'll nev- er guess! – why, the The Big Bad Wolf, of course...!" That's right, folks: the same Big Bad Wolf that's famous for 'huffing, and puffing, and blow- ing paddock-gates down'; and al- so, for having big, shiny, pointy... TEETH! ('All the better to devour little ponies with', remember?)" Already, then, I suppose you can tell EXACTLY what's going to happen next; and if you can't... trust me, it's pretty 'Grimm'. But on with our story: "So it came to pass that, one moonlit night in early Septem- ber, the Queen's servants forgot to properly lock the paddock gate, as instructed. And lo and behold! When the sun arose the following morning, it illuminated a grisly spectacle on the grounds of the Von der Leyen family estate, in Burgdorf-Beinhorn, Lower Saxo- ny. "Queen Ursula arrived for her early morning ride, as usual: on- ly to find the paddock-gate flung wide open; her servants nowhere to be seen; and – most 'shock- ing' of all - bits and pieces of her beloved little Dolly, scattered all over the gore-stained glade. "And through her tears of rage and woe, she also discerned something else: a trail of bloody pawprints, leading off in the di- rection of the brooding Black For- est, beyond..." Right: enough with the fairy- tale version, because – in case you missed it the first time (it was headline news all over Europe: though barely even mentioned, here) – every single detail of the above story is actually... TRUE. Fantasy trappings aside: it's true that the European Commission President was (until September 1, 2022) the proud owner of a po- ny named 'Dolly'; and it is equal- ly true that the hapless beast fell prey to one (or more) of the cir- ca-1,200 Eurasian grey wolves that have crossed the Polish bor- der into Germany, since that spe- cies first made a resurgence in Eu- rope, a few decades ago. Meanwhile, there are a few oth- er truths that we haven't really got to, in our fairy-tale: including that the Eurasian grey wolf – while certainly increasing in number – remains a 'critically-endangered species'; and for this very reason, it is supposedly 'protected' under EU law (i.e., the same EU law that Ursula von der Leyen should real- ly be the first to a uphold, as Com- mission President.) Ah, but how did von der Leyen react, to the death of her dear- ly-departed Dolly? Did she do what any sensible, horse-loving individual would have done, un- der the same circumstances? That is to say: 'choose a slightly SAF- ER place to house their precious pets, next time: rather than the only region of Germany known to be inhabited by Europe's larg- est carnivore?' (Honestly though: she may as well have just 'rung the dinner-bell', herself: shouting 'HERE, WOLFY-WOLFY! COME GET YOUR DIN-DINS!', while she was at it...) No matter, though. Because Ur- sula von Der Leyen doesn't blame herself, for Dolly's tragic death. (I mean: what sort of a Grimm Brothers fairy-tale would it even be, with a 'happy ending' like that?) Quite the contrary: she de- cided go full-on 'Wicked Witch of the West', on that dratted Big Bad Wolf: vowing, then and there, to wreak her vengeance, not just on the specimen that killed her pre- cious pony (which was duly iden- tified, by the way; and – I kid you not – code-named 'GW950m', by the official German hit-squad)... but by wiping every last moth- erf***ing specimen of 'Canis Lu- pus Lupus', off the face of the en- tire European continent! Oh, OK: that was, perhaps, a slight exaggeration. What REAL- LY happened was (as reported by Politico, in January 2023): "In the weeks following Dolly's death, von der Leyen ordered Commis- sion officials to re-evaluate the rules strictly protecting wolves in Europe. In late November, she called for an 'in-depth analysis' into the wolf menace after reports of increased attacks on livestock, especially in the Alps." Citing "numerous reports of wolf attacks on animals and of in- creased risk to local people," von der Leyen wrote: "Understand- ably, this situation raises ques- tions in the affected regions about whether the current protection status of wolves is justified." Nor did it stop there. As recently as last Monday, Politico reported that: "Brussels is entering a new phase in its work to tackle the re- turn of wolves, and is asking 'local communities, scientists and all interested parties' for data on the animal's impact [...]" The Commission President her- self was quoted as saying: "the concentration of wolf packs in some European regions has be- come a real danger for livestock; and potentially also for humans." Now: to be fair, the first part of that statement is certainly NOT the stuff of fantasy. Wild wolves do indeed pose a real threat, to livestock – especially sheep and goats (which account for 80% of Europe's wolf-related livestock fatalities). But... to people? Do those 1,200 Eurasian grey wolves really pose the sort of 'menace' to human life-and-limb, that Ursula von der Leyen would have us all believe? Judging by the data collected so far, as part of her own Commis- sion's 'in-depth analysis' since November 2022... it doesn't really look like it. A report by Germany's own wolf-specific agency, DBBW, con- cluded that: "Wolves in the wild usually do not pose a threat to humans. Wolves are very cautious animals that generally avoid con- tact with humans. To put it sim- ply, they are just not interested in humans, as they neither categorise us as prey, nor as conspecifics." And according to the latest re- port by the Norwegian Institute for Nature Research: "In Eu- rope and North America we on- ly found evidence for 12 attacks (with 14 victims) of which two (both in North America) were fatal, across a period of 18 years. Considering that there are close to 60,000 wolves in North Ameri- ca and 15,000 in Europe, all shar- ing space with hundreds of mil- lions of people, it is apparent that the risks associated with a wolf attack are above zero, but far too low to calculate." So exactly where Ursula von der Leyen herself is seeing all this presumed 'evidence', of wolves posing an 'increased risk to local people', remains rather unclear. Somewhat more conspicuous, however, is the evidence that those 1,200 Eurasian grey wolves may indeed pose a 'danger' – albeit of an altogether different kind - to Ursula von der Leyen, personally. Having already devoured her precious little pony... the Big Bad Wolf now threatens to eat away at her own political support, among Europe's not-insignificant live- stock-farmer population: just a few months ahead of the next European parliamentary election (which coincides with the end of Ursula von der Leyen's own term, as European Commission Pres- ident... and therefore, with her own re-election.) And given that European farm- ers, in general, have already long been complaining, about the Eu- ropean Commission's 'Green deal' policies – which, paradoxically, include targets for the 'rewilding of Europe': not to mention, trans- forming agricultural land into 'natural habitats' (for the benefit of animals like wolves, no less)... ... well: do I even need to go on? It should be obvious, by now, that Ursula von der Leyen's lat- est 'war' on the Big Bad Wolf, is NOT motivated by any genuine concern for human safety... and no, not for the safety of livestock, either [Note: if that really was her concern, the Commission could very easily provide funding, for those farmers to protect their herds slightly better than she did her own pony; not to mention, to compensate them for the animals they occasionally lose to random wolf-attacks...]. Nor is it even driven by 'venge- ance for Dolly', for that matter (in which case: though clearly irrational, there would at least be a certain romantic, 'Captain Ahab-like' appeal, to Ursula Von der Leyen's otherwise 'ecocidal' wolf-obsession...) No, indeed. In the end, it all boils down to nothing more romantic, or rational, than a classic case of good old-fashioned 'European electioneering'. Ursula von der Leyen desperately needs the votes of Germany's livestock farmers (and agricultural community, in general)... and so – notwithstand- ing her own Commission's tar- gets, to 'rewild' the European con- tinent – the Eurasian grey wolf simply 'has to go'. And when the first reports, commissioned by von der Leyen herself, return their unanimous verdict – i.e., that wolves do NOT pose any real threat to humans – the Commission simply sticks to its guns, regardless: and insists on its mission to implement a wolf-culling programme, in defi- ance of all scientific advice. Almost makes you wonder, doesn't it, which is actually the more 'predatory', 'rapacious', and... well... 'dangerous', of those two European animals. No of- fence, or anything: but given a choice between 'the Big Bad Wolf', and 'another five years of Ursula von der Leyen, as Euro- pean Commission President': I'd sooner take my chances with a pack of wild wolves, thank you very much... Ursula and the Big Bad Wolf Raphael Vassallo