Issue link: https://maltatoday.uberflip.com/i/1507552
OPINION 10 maltatoday | WEDNESDAY • 13 SEPTEMBER 2023 REMEMBER that old Aesop's fable, about a cute little lamb named, um, 'Lambkin'... who was constantly stalked by a Big Bad Wolf named (ahem) 'Mil- dred'... and who kept crying out, "IT'S THE WOLLOF! IT'S THE WOLLOF! That's who it is, folks! THE WOLLOF!"... ... until his trusty protector, an Old English Sheepdog named 'Bristle Hound', would invariably show up, just in time to foil Mil- dred's plans? (As a rule, by yank- ing the Wollof off-screen by the neck, with his shepherd's crook)? Hang on, wait. That's not the original Aesop's fable entitled 'The Boy Who Cried Wolf'. That's what happened to that story, af- ter someone at Hanna-Barbera thought it might make a good ba- sis for a children's cartoon... But oh well: it's still a variation of that same, archetypal allegory... so I may as well stick with cartoon version, for now: with the proviso that my re-telling of Hannah-Bar- bera's 'It's the Wolf!' series (which ran on TVM back in the 1970s) is going to be... well, slightly closer to the original. Let's say, for instance, that in one episode, Mildred fails to actually show up, as usual. After a while, little Lambkin gets bored... and decides it would be a good laugh to just cry out "It's the Wollof! It's the Wollof!", anyway. Naturally, Bristle Hound would still come charging to Lambkin's rescue, as usual... the first time. And yes: the second time, too. And most likely, also the third, fourth, fifth, sixth, seventh, eighth, ninth AND tenth times, on the trot (sheepdogs are, after all, known to be extraordinarily 'trusting', even by canine standards)... ... but, well, there must be a lim- it to how often even a dog would keep falling for that same old trick. In fact: I reckon that our version of Hanna-Barbera's 'It's the Wolf!' might actually be way too 'dark', even for a 1970s children's car- toon. It would probably end with Bristle Hound deciding to just skewer little Lambkin, once and for all; and then inviting Mildred to a lamb-cutlet barbecue, carved straight off the spit (a fitting end, I might add, for one of the most an- noying cartoon characters in TV history...) Ah, but where does the Prime Minister fit into all this, you might be wondering? How am I going to yank Robert Abela off his political podium... and thrust him head- long into our evolving allegory? Simple. It goes like this: • Robert Abela takes the place of little Lambkin; • "It's the Wollof!, It's the Wollof!" represents all the things he consistently says, to deflect criticism of his own government's policies; • And good old 'Bristle Hound' represents US: i.e., the long-suffering Maltese electorate (and especially, I would say, the large major- ity that voted Labour) which has now put up with three whole years, of a Prime Minister who keeps telling us things that we all know are patently untrue... and yet, expects us to keep be- lieving him, all the same. Sorry, but... once again, there's a limit to how often that strategy can work (and for Prime Minis- ters, I should think, it's a lot lower than for cartoon characters). Now: I won't bore you with a full list of ALL the times, that Robert Abela has said things that ended up being, strictly-speaking, 'false': either (as in the Abortion Amend- ment debacle) by initially raising expectations of a liberal, progres- sive, and potentially life-saving reform... only to dash those hopes, by caving to every single conserva- tive demand; Or else, by doggedly insisting that there is no need to change any of his government's (clearly inef- fective) policies: on the basis that "they would all work, just fine... if only everyone else just 'did their bit', more." Examples of the latter approach would include his recent tirade against 'speeding motorists': when he told us that there was no need to introduce traffic-calming measures... because, erm, 'drivers should be more responsible'. (Gee, thanks!) But I've already written about that case, and others like it, be- fore... so let's take a look at the lat- est example. At the time of writing, our front- page headline is: 'PAMA propos- es ODZ garden, with underlying shopping mall'; and in the story, we learn that "PG Holdings, the owners of the Pama supermar- ket, have presented new plans for an extension on adjacent ODZ land to create a new underground shopping mall. [...] plans also fore- see the excavation of three under- ground floors to accommodate 9,970sq.m of retail and catering space and a massive car park ca- tering for 359 cars..." Significantly, we are told that "The Environment and Resourc- es Authority has consistently ob- jected to the plans to develop the ODZ site, fearing that this could set a new precedent for similar developments resulting in further urban sprawl." In brief, then: it seems that yet another Maltese company – this time, a supermarket chain – has decided to simply ignore all exist- ing planning regulations: by ap- plying for development, on land that is entirely 'ODZ' (which, by the way, stands for 'Outside the Development Zones': just in case you, like Robert Abela, didn't al- ready know that). So technically, the entire appli- cation should not even be up for consideration by the Planning Authority, at all. And yet... as we can all see with our own eyes: PAMA did not hesitate even one millisecond, to apply for a devel- opment that would be completely IRREGULAR (if approved). Like- wise, the PA has evidently allowed this irregular application to stand: and will discuss whether or not to grant the permit, despite the ob- jections of its own ERA. In any case: I thought I'd point all that out, because it all happened less than a week after the Prime Minister gave an interview on One TV, in which (and I quote): "Abela had harsh words for de- velopers that submitted appli- cations that did not respect the planning regulations. 'Applica- tions that do not conform to the regulations should not be submit- ted. This serves only to anger and antagonise the community.' "He added that applications in the village core had to convince the community that they were an added value. 'There are still those cowboys who believe they can force their position,' Abela said. "There should be a balance be- tween economic growth and sus- tainability. If you own a private property, you can't do whatever you like with it. Bring forward sus- tainable projects that make sense, and you will have our backing..." Hmmm. I suppose you can al- ready see, for yourselves, a cer- tain resemblance with 'Lamb- kin', there. Only it this case, the 'wolf-calling' dynamic works the other way round. Where Lambkin tried to convince Bristle Hound there WAS, in fact, a 'Wollof', to be abruptly 'yanked away'... Robert Abela is hell-bent on insisting that there is no such 'Wollof', at all (in The Prime Minister who cried: 'It's the Wollof! It's the Wollof!' Raphael Vassallo Prime minister Robert Abela