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MALTATODAY 21 January 2024

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AT this distance in time, I can't remember if the original version was inspired by an actual shop- sign, hanging outside an actual shop somewhere… or whether it was just a random witticism, included in the 'Armada Book of Jokes and Riddles' (which was more or less my Bible, as a child). Either way, I'm sure you've all heard it before: 'Why go some- where else to be cheated? Come here first!' But I'm also fairly certain that – like me – you might find it a good deal less hilarious, today, than all those years ago. Because let's face it, folks: it's not exactly much of a 'joke' anymore, is it? Oh, no! It is, in fact, more like a very real question, that I end up genuine- ly asking myself around three or four times a week. Only in my case, it goes some- thing like: 'Why go to THAT particular supermarket, to buy products that used to cost a mere fraction of the current price, just a few short months ago… when I can freely choose to pay the ex- act same over-inflated sum, for (more or less) the exact same products, at pretty much any oth- er supermarket I please?' And OK: there may well be a few valid reasons, on which to base your choice. One shop might simply be 'within easier walking distance than another' (even if – at the rate the PA is currently dishing out commercial permits – those distances might one day have to be measured in 'inches', rather than 'feet')… Or it could even boil down to purely personal reasons, which have nothing to do with shopping at all. In my case, for instance, the choice is dictated purely by the quality of the shopkeeper's Spotify play-list: permanently on loop in the background, while I pace up and down the aisles (try- ing to remember what the heck I had even come there to buy, in the first place...) One thing, however, is certain. Whatever your choice, you will still end up paying grotesquely over-inflated prices, for all the stuff you used to purchase for a good deal less, before. Yes, that's right: even if you went all those miles out of your way, in search of the 'biggest internation- al supermarket-chains', offering the 'lowest possible prices on the market'. For whatever you might have saved on your shopping bill, will be more-than amply com- pensated for by (among other things) the increased expenditure on petrol; the loss of your pre- cious time; and quite possibly, al- so the rapid deterioration of your mental health, as 25% of your en- tire life is spent in endless traffic. Make no mistake, then. That old witticism, from the 'Armada Book of Jokes and Riddles', seems to have outgrown its earlier 'joke' phase; and has now matured into a fairly accurate description of, not just the current Maltese eco- nomic situation, in general… but also, the contemporary Europe- an/Western economic model, as a whole. In other words: as consumers living in a 'free-market econo- my', we enjoy the full 'freedom' to choose exactly whom to be 'shafted by', for ourselves: in any circumstance, and without any interference whatsoever. And there is no shortage of choice, by the way: in fact, hard- ly a week goes by without the announcement of a whole new 'Mega-Intergalactic Supermar- ket Chain, soon to be opening in Malta for the first time…' (for the sole purpose, naturally, of 'shaft- ing its customers', in exactly the same way as all the others…) If I'm not mistaken, the Italians even have an idiomatic expres- sion of their own, to describe this sort of thing. They call it 'L-im- barrazzo della scelta': literally, the 'embarrassment of choice…' Ah, but how much more 'em- barrassing' (not to mention 'un- amusing') the same 'choice' starts to appear… when you apply it to European/Western POLITICS, instead of 'economy'? Right: let's just take a step back here, and admire the view from across the Malta-Sicily channel. Even if you're not the type to fol- low international politics, every day… you will surely have had it drummed into you, by now, that this year promises to deliv- er quite a number of potentially 'game-changing' scenarios, on the global political stage. Among these are (in order of priority, for Europe): The Amer- ican Presidential Election, in November; The European Par- liamentary elections, in June; na- tional elections in four EU states (Belgium, Portugal, Austria, Fin- land); and of course, the various (unpredictable) developments of all the WARS [!] the EU now finds itself involved in… from Ukraine, to Israel, to Yemen (and who knows? Maybe even Iran, by the end of the year). Meanwhile, it just so happens that ALL those scenarios seem to have a certain, shall we say, ' in- gredient' in common. In one way or another, they are all somehow linked up with the (very real) prospect of a 'radical resurgence radical Far Right ideology, sweep- ing right across Europe.' Or at least: that's the impression I'm getting, right now, from the unmistakable note of panic, that has crept into certain European headlines – and, it must be said, 'political parties' - of late. Here are a few samples: 'The far right may surge in up- coming EU elections' (AP) 'The far right is moving into Eu- rope's mainstream' (The Finan- cial Times) 'Far-right rise could make Eu- rope ungovernable' (Reuters) 'Trump told EU that if Europe is attacked, US will never come to help' (Every single newspaper, across the entire world…) Naturally, I won't bother ex- plaining the various ramifica- tions of all that, for the future 'peace and stability' of the Euro- pean continent. But let's just say, for now, that all Europe's 'main- stream parties' are – if you'll ex- cuse the expression – 'shitting bricks', at the prospect that even one of those eventualities might actually materialise in the near future. Hence, a whole new round of (even more 'panicky') headlines, to inform us of the mad scramble that is now taking place, within Europe's 'mainstream' political circuit. In brief, it seems that all Eu- rope's supposedly 'mainstream' parties – the Conservatives, the Socialists, the Liberals (though to be fair: not the Greens, as far as I can see) – are positively falling over themselves, in their sheer desperation to somehow stem this 'wholesale haemorrhage, to the Right'. In France, for instance, Macron has just announced a whole raft of new policy measures - the least of which could easily have been lifted from the 'Gow-Beck-To- Yor-Kantry!' manifesto - prompt- ing headlines such as: "Macron's plan to move right: School uni- forms, national service and more babies…" Even more alarmingly, howev- er: in its haste to appease as many right-wing, populist concerns maltatoday | SUNDAY • 21 JANUARY 2024 10 OPINION 'Why vote for others to be cheated? Vote for us instead!' Raphael Vassallo

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